Role Reversal: Having to be the patient instead of the nurse!! Part I: Pre-Op

We don't hear enough about positive hospital experiences.  This is probably because people do not consider any reason they need to stay in the hospital as a "good thing". I, on the other hand, saw the reason for my medical stay as the beginning to positive things coming my way.

I have had issues with my thyroid for over 15 years.  I have gained weight and lost weight.  I have grown hair and lost hair.  I have been high on life and so down that I didn't think I could reach the bottom even if I stood on my tippy-toes.  My hospital stay was to have my thyroid removed and although the surgery is somewhat risky and I was terrified, it meant that maybe I could get some sort of normalcy in my hormones.  

My morning started with an alarm going off at 0400.  I had barely slept due to my nervousness.  I have not really slept well in weeks due to insomnia and night sweats.  I got ready and headed to the hospital. I started my journey with registration. The lady was very pleasant and was helpful and willing to lead me in the right direction.  Then my long walk to the "Day of Surgery" unit.  I was met by a UCC that showed me to my room and had me change.  Nothing on except a gown that shows your hiney to the world!!  Oh yeah, and the SCD's on my legs with "grippy socks".  We can not forget those.  Then I waited.  The UCC had mentioned that a nurse would be coming right in to start my IV but no one showed.  I thought about asking why someone that had showed up after me had already gotten their IV and was wheeling to the OR, but then I realized that I was one of "THEM".  Yep, I was one of those impatient people that walks up to the desk and asks repeatedly when it was my turn.  I quickly took a deep breath and decided to chill because I could not be one of "THEM"

After several hours, or minutes, I could not tell because time had started to stand still at this point, a smiling face peeked around the curtain.  "Finally", I said in my head in an annoyed silent voice.  I held my arm out for the IV.  She explained her procedure to me which included a bit of subcutaneous lidocaine for comfort.  I quickly said that it was not necessary and she could just stick me because I did not mind needles.  She insisted and I said fine.  I heard a bit of condescension in my voice.  This is when I realized that I was being one of "THOSE" patients.  "THOSE" patients are the ones that know everything because they have a little experience in the medical field and they surely could do your job better than you do..... in their mind.  Yep, that was me this morning, one of "THOSE".  The smiling face stuck this tiny needle in my arm and squirted  little bit of lidocaine in the tissue.  It was barely noticeable.  She followed it with the angiocath which I barely felt.  She also placed it in my forearm which I loved because it does no limit movement.  I guess she just may know what she is doing after all. Maybe I should just tuck my tail between my legs and shut up!!  I ate my pride and commended her on her great job.  Then she did something that I was not ready for.  She asked us if she could say a word of prayer with us before I went to the OR.   REALLY????  You are just gonna throw your personal self out there like that to people that you barely know?   Especially to someone that was acting like she knew everything and probably annoyed you a little?  I looked at her, humbled, and said, "Yes, please."

After her eloquent words of prayer and praise I felt a warm comfort wash over me.  I so appreciated the extra time she spent to say a prayer with me, not only because it was comforting to me but the way it made my mother feel.  My mother is a devout Christian who has had a rough month after being diagnosed with breast cancer and is still healing from a lumpectomy less than two weeks ago.  I was worried about how the stress of her baby girl going to surgery would effect her healing.  Seeing her smile in relief that my nurse was a christian was so nice because her smile (the real one and not the fake one to make other people happy) has been a little hard to conjure up these days.

Ok, now we have finished with the DOS Unit.  Now we wait until someone comes to pick me up to go to go to the OR.  Things started happening fast at this point.  A very pleasant young lady came to transport me to the PACU area to finish up the preparation.  There is where I met several people.  I do not remember the male nurse I met there but he was great and talked to me constantly because he seemed to notice that the silence made me even more nervous.  The CRNA and the Anesthesiologist both came in to ask questions as well.  They made small talk and also kept the conversation casual which calmed me.  I think they all noticed my anxiety after my 25th trip to the bathroom.  I was not sure how I was urinating so much considering I had been NPO since 2100 the night before.  The time had finally come to start wheeling toward the OR.  My eyes must have shown my terror because the ever-so-generous CRNA squeezed a healthy does of Versed into my IV to help me "relax" for the trip to the OR that was only 20 feet away at that point.  The room began to vibrate and I felt sleepy.  The room seemed very bright and I felt the need to squint a bit.  We got in the OR and I started to shimmy myself over to the OR table.  I saw them rushing around to prepare numerous kinds of materials but could not tell you what any of them were.  I was very confused at this point and just new that I wanted to be supine again and close my eyes.  I hear the CRNA tell me that she is going to go ahead and give me the REALLY sleepy medicine which I assumed to be the Propofol.  All I can remember is thinking, "bring it on and let's get this over with!"

Then there was darkness.......  To be continued later in Part II.